[ToC]

 

Hugh Morris, The Art of Kissing, found pamphlet, 1936, no publishing information

"ARRANGE IT SO THAT THE GIRL IS SEATED AGAINST THE ARM OF THE SOFA"

In kissing a girl whose experience with osculation is limited, it is a good thing to work up to the kissing of the lips. Only an arrant fool seizes hold of such a girl, when they are comfortably seated on the sofa, and suddenly shoves his face into her's [sic] and smacks her lips. Naturally, the first thing he should do is to arrange it so that the girl is seated against the arm of the sofa while he is seated at her side. In this way, she cannot edge away from him when becomes more serious in his attentions. This done, on some pretext of another, such as a gallant attempt to adjust the cushions behind her, he manages to insinuate his arm, first around the back of the sofa and then, gradually, around her shoulders. If she flinches, don't worry. If she flinches and makes an outcry, don't worry. If she flinches, makes an outcry and tries to get up from the sofa, don't worry. Hold her, gently but firmly, and allay her fears with kind, reassuring words. Remember what Shakespeare said about "a woman's no!" However, if she flinches, makes an outcry, a loud stentorian outcry, mind you, and starts to scratch your face, then start to worry or start to get yourself out of a bad situation. Such girls are not to be trifled with...or kssed. It is such as they, in most cases, who still believe the story of the story which brings babies because of the consequences of a kiss.