SUBJECT>Re: After the Film POSTER>Metz EMAIL>mkemlmekm@aol.com DATE>1107846471 IP_ADDRESS>235-125.netwurx.net PREVIOUS>83069 NEXT> IMAGE> LINKNAME> LINKURL>

Altitudinous Tutsi --

Cheadle and George (director) were in original version, but left on the cutting room floor.

This was meant to be the McInerney (sp?) kinda second person which is really first person, not the accusatory second person.

Damn right I won't go for souls. Soul is not part of my vocabulary.

Nothing I write is easy for me. Some people got that gift. I don't.

The explaining husband (explaining beyond his mastery of fact) was intended to irk. So thanks for your irkage.

And thanks for reading.

Machete'd
-- Who 2

: Flick instead of film, maybe?

: And, I know you won't but I'd tag on a line at
: the end--yes, I'd write beyond the ending
: because right now, it feels too safe, too
: pat. Something about proceeding to discuss
: at length Cheadle's chances of winning the
: Oscar.

: I usually like second person--hell, there was a
: time when I wrote nothing but second person
: poems--and I understand your choice of its
: use here---it does serve very effectively to
: point a finger at the reader. YOU, it's
: saying. YOU who donated 5 bucks to the
: tsunami fund and have already forgotten that
: disaster since it's fallen off CNN's daily
: rotation. I almost kinda sorta wish this was
: first person. But the second person does do
: its job, so I'll shut up.

: I almost wanted "souls"--one million
: souls, instead of people. I know you won't
: go for that. Still, it never hurts to say,
: what if this and what about that, right?
: Even if all it's good for is a laugh. (grin)

: Was this an easy poem for you to write? I was
: going to begin this crit by saying how
: refreshing it was to read a Metz poem that
: expressed itself outside the typical,
: expected, wise-ass, colloquial, elbowing,
: diction-specific, hyphenated voice....but at
: the same time....I almost kinda miss it. (I
: know, I know, I want it both ways.) The
: reaosn I asked if this was easy for you to
: write is because it doesn't feel as crafted
: as some of your stuff, which isn't to say I
: don't think you didn't put in alot of work.
: But I almost feel like this poem needs a
: counterpoint although I can't say quite what
: that counterpoint out to be.

: Oh, and hey, the reluctant feminist in me was
: less than happy with the husband explaining
: the event to his wife. Honestly, that irked
: me.

: Laurel